Sunday, March 7, 2010

I just wanted to record some of the thoughts I have had the past few weeks as I prepare to have more than one Princess to take care of. I say Princess in order to remind myself that they are of a royal heritage and belong not to me but to the Lord, who created them and knows them and love them more than I can even comprehend. As Carolyn learns and grows she inspires me just by being her sun-shiny little self, and I am truly humbled to have her in my stewardship. I know that Clarissa will be the same way.

Carolyn loves nothing more these days than to sit on the couch with me and "talk to Clarissa". Of course this always involves my naked belly haha. B reads to her, sings to her, feels her move, kisses her, plays puppets with (at) her, tries to share her drinks with her through my belly button, and once she has even tattled on her which was hilarious. We were talking to my Mom and she said, "Mommy, Clarissa is in trouble." I asked if Clarissa was being naughty and what she was in trouble for, and she said "Clarissa is being naughty. She's climbing". Oh the things that run through the mind of a toddler! There was another really funny moment when she was patting my belly and we were talking about how baby Clarissa lives in Mama's belly for now but when she has grown big enough she will come and live in our house. B continued patting and said, "Poor Clarissa . . . locked inside". She said it with such a look of genuine concern and sympathy it melted my heart and cracked me up at the same time!

It's good for me to take breaks throughout the day to rest and prevent my ankles from getting out of control even if it is hard sometimes to stop whatever chore I am in the middle of. I truly treasure that time with my two girls. I find great comfort in their youth and innocence. As every parent knows, caring for a toddler is exhausting in every possible way and at times frustrating. But at the same time, I get to spend all day every day with someone who is completely free from the stains of this world. Am I learning all I can from her? Am I teaching her in the way the Lord would have me do? I sure hope so. I love to rock B and feel Clarissa's little wiggles. Sometimes they are genuine interactions and sometimes not, but each one is so precious and each one is a miracle. It's interesting - more than Craig's voice or even mine, she reacts most often and with the most force to B's. Clarissa gets SO excited when B talks to her and I just love to watch two little celestial beings play. I know that is one of the things I will love the most about Clarissa's arrival - getting to watch their interactions rather than just feeling them.

One thing I really enjoy about pregnancy is being able to protect her from the world. From evil, from illness, even from the weather etc. I have been able to carry both my girls through a temple session in utero. With B I was 6 months along, with Clarissa it was the day before I found out I was pregnant but I had my suspicions. They were both powerfully and unforgettably spiritual experiences. Never again in this world or the next will I be able to complete that ordinance with them, and I treasure the one time I did get to. All I can do now is teach them correctly and (hopefully) be around to be their escort when they complete those ordinances for themselves.

3 comments:

Paula -- CutieFruity said...

that was one of the sweetest moments for me, was getting to see my dear daughters reunite for the first time. I am still mad it was interrupted by people I asked to not be in the room, but being together, just us a family is so so so precious. These sisters together are so amazing. I'm excited that soon you can have your moment, too.

Just Only Me said...

What a tender post. I couldn't make it through a session, it was WAY too hot for me and I would get sick so often. What a neat experience. I love this post!

ang :o) said...

very touching post. you have a way with words. thanks for the reminder of how incredible these spirits are that come in to our lives and how privileged we are to take care of them. i adore having to two girls in a row so i was thrilled to find out you would get that chance too. it's the most fun thing to watch them interact!